7 Rules for a Happy Life

Rule #1. Express gratitude. Whatever the situation may be, when people do something nice for you, help you, invest their time into supporting you in some way or providing you with something positive, always tell them thank you and express their gratitude. Tell a stranger 'thank you', too. Being nice and grateful never hurts. And you never know: even the smallest of things might make someone else's day. It feels good to be appreciated.

Rule #2. Don't try to make sense of someone else's chaos. This includes all instances of miscommunication gone irrevocably wrong. Say, if there is a relationship in which you feel stuck because people refuse to hear your side of the story and are blinded by their own opinions. Example: I literally had multiple recurring arguments about the same issue with my ex, where he would be so focused on the reasons he thought why I behaved a certain way that when I actually would repeatedly tell him why I behaved this way he would argue with me about it, as though literally not hearing what I am saying to him (probably because his own opinion was being too loud in his head). Imagine someone saying the Earth is flat and then the Earth itself turning to them and saying, "I'm actually not flat" and then they just stand there for a couple of seconds and go, "Naaaah, u flat". Trying to make sense of why people don't hear what you're saying, why they think of you so badly when you've done nothing wrong to them, and other ways in which there is just some type of misunderstanding or miscommunication you don't seem to be able to fix, is arguably one of the most nerve-wrecking, time-wasting and soul-draining activities ever.

Rule #3. Engage with people. Do it everywhere -- talk to the baristas at a random coffee shop you came to, pay attention to people asking you for directions, anything. Say something to a stranger when you feel the urge to even if your mind is telling you you're going to look like a weirdo. Talking to strangers isn't weird -- we are all human and human interaction is what makes as strive as social beings. Don't overly isolate yourself when you don't have to -- the modern world is already doing that to you for you.

You never know: even the smallest of things might make someone else's day.

Rule #4. Communicate in a mature way (and don't ever say anything you might regret saying later). Say it in a mature way or don't say anything at all. Because, believe it or not, in the long term you will never be let down by this. Look at it this way: if you communicate maturely, people cannot use your own words or your tone as an argument against you. Or, there is no chance of people finding out you trash-talked them behind their backs because you were temporarily mad at them about something -- well, guess what, you were mad temporarily, but the relationship is ruined permanently. Which brings me to my next point.

Rule #5. Don't talk ill or even any shade about people behind their backs (even when it's true). I have to admit, I'm not too good at this yet, I 1000% will call people out on their bullshit or even just their behaviours or traits I don't approve of -- but to other people. For me, I suppose, this works as a stress-relieving technique and is also a weird mixture of righteousness and self-indulgence, I get peace by feeling like "justice" was restored even in the smallest way -- by me venting to a friend about someone who "did me wrong". I'm not proud of this and this is something I really have to learn to stop doing.

Say it in a mature way or don't say anything at all.

Rule #6. Listen to your body. I'm not only saying not to neglect your obvious physical needs like the need to eat and drink water but also I'm saying to pay attention to smaller things, especially when there are conflicting needs. Say, you're sick but you're really bored and thus miserable. In such instances you need to listen very attentively to yourself because you have to choose whether to stay home and recover more or go out with friends and get out of your own mind. The frustrating part about this is, you might not get your needs right, you might make a bad choice, and, most aggravating of all, there's no way of knowing that beforehand. There is no obvious good and bad choice. And here's when the next rule comes in handy.

Rule #7. Be prepared to fuck up. You will fuck up. Let's repeat it together: I will fuck up. And now also add: and it's okay. Doesn't mean you should fuck things up on purpose, but just chill with the perfectionism and the anxiety. Making mistakes is okay. Just try not to make serious ones -- that's it. But missing your train or forgetting your wallet at home is fucking normal, let shit like that go once and for all, for God's sake (and your own mental health's sake).